Timelord Profiles

A supplemental guide to Timelord's members and contributors.

Profile Entries:	J > Joe Schofield
	L > Lungbarrovian

IDENTITY CARD

Name: Joe Schofield

Aliases:

Lungbarrovian (at our forum)

Age: Older than I’d like to be.

Location: UK

UNPLUGGED

What do you like?

Movies, music, mates.

What do you dislike?

Politics, spiders, Robbie Williams.

What do you do when you're unplugged:

I try to make the most of the time I've been given.

INSIGHT

What Animals do you hate?

Horses make me nervous, though I don't really hate them.

Which Hartnell era monster do you most aspire to?

Celation. Someone who lurks, looks funny and generally keeps his mouth shut.

Coffee or chocolate?

Coffee.

Ideal job?

Househusband.

Have you invaded Poland?

They've suffered enough.

Is fast food evil?

Only the conglomerates that sell it.

Have you ever been accused of a crime of fashion?

I did once wear a Doctor Who t-shirt on a boozy night out. Never again.

Have you seen anything supernatural and / or been kidnapped by aliens?

I don't think aliens would ever want to kidnap me, and though I've been to some spooky places, I've never seen anything ghostly.

What is your cure for writers block?

Walking around and thinking. Music can help too.

What's the worst fan fiction you have ever written?

Lots, but most of it unpublished, which is how it shall remain!

Of all that's archived on Timelord and RF, what's the thing you're proudest of contributing?

The Prize.

What happened in the year you were fourteen?

A family holiday in Bournemouth. It rained.

If you could be any age again, what would it be?

21, and with all the choices I didn't take then open again.

If you could visit any moment in history what would it be?

To find out how the dinosaurs really died.

What crossover story should never be made... ever?

I'm against crossovers on general principles, particularly those that involve things that are totally different in style and theme.

If you ruled the world, who would be first against the wall?

All these puffed-up self-important celebrities who make millions and whine about how unhappy they are - like Robbie Williams, David Beckham and their ilk.

What would your entry in the Encyclopaedia Galactica say about you?

He came, he saw, he sort of wandered off again.

Borg or Cybermen?

Cybermen every time.

If you were a Doctor Who Title which one would you be?

Oh No It Isn't

Should any Twin Peaks fans who survived the purge be arrested?

Twin Peaks was daring and innovative for its time and definitely a lot better than the sort of watered-down crap US TV dishes out these days.

Which missing Who story would you most like to be refound?

The Dalek Masterplan.

Who would play you in a cheap BBC drama about your life?

Ray Winstone. Not because I look like him, but because I'd be interested to see how he'd play me.

Computer games?

Fallout, Baldur's Gate and Wizardry 8.

What would you like on your epitaph?

This is what happens when you play with matches.

PG or 18?

Censorship is a necessary evil. Children do need protection from certain things.

Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori?

I'll stick with what General George Patton said on the matter - "It's not about dying for your country, but making the other bastard die for his".

Have you ever been, or are you now, a member of a Communist organisation?

I don't vote. I'd never belong to a political party, Right or Left.

What is the best word?

Sizzle. Particularly when applied to bacon.

When did you first get involved with this online group?

I've been wandering in and out of the group for a while, mainly as a lurker.

Half-empty or half-full?

I try to keep topped up.

Are we (as a creative group) currently in a period of progress or regress?

Creativity is difficult to measure - quantity doesn't necessarily mean quality, after all - but there seems to be something for all tastes going on at the moment, and that's never a bad thing. Progress, for sure.

LISTS

Top 3 favourite films